Mr. New Year

Mr. New Year
...and a Happy New Year to you too.

Tuesday, August 11, 2009

Those freaking query letters

When I sat down 12 years ago and decided that I was going to write my first fan-fiction I had no idea 10 years later, I would be writing a daggone book, but I am!! I also had know freaking idea that getting a book published would be like pulling teeth from a toothless man!!

Why didn't someone tell me this shit? I mean Stephen King, John Sanford, that Twilight woman, and that Harry Potter harlot makes it look so damn easy!! But I digress...

This new found information has caused me to wonder exactly how some of the Authors that I read or have read ever got published. Some of them are atrocious, but to be fair, most are really freaking great!!

Not only that, but with the caveats placed on these damn query letters, which had to be created by a woman while she was on her monthly, after her husband left her butt for his older, fatter, and uglier secretary, and during the time that the IRS was auditing her...

Okay, I lost my train of thought, but you get what I'm getting at if you've ever gotten one of those overly sweet rejection letters that go something like this, "That's really great work, but it just didn't excite me enough," or "We love where this is going, but it's just not right for us." Blah...blah shit! Let me digress one more time...

Now this blog isn't going to have anything to do with that infamous book, but I will be using this blog to take some of my frustrations out on the leviathan publishing companies, the anal retentive agencies, the dream stealing vanities, and the money hoarding PODs that promise you the world and deliver absolutely nothing.

Yes, yes, I will be throwing tantrums from time to time. After all, I'm only human.

I'm thinking that maybe if I get some of this stuff off my barely there chest, I'll be able to get some sleep at night or at the very least stop running my head against the same walls every other day!!

I'll also be posting some of my rejection letters here. I won't post the really nasty ones because those are what they are, but I'll post the ones where you just know Mr. or Ms. Agent was sitting there typing, deleting and typing some more until it sounded just nice enough, but not too nice, and had just enough rejection in it, but not enough to make a person want to slit his/her wrists.

Yeah, those are the ones I'm talking about.

Anyway, this is going to be my therapy session from time to time as I'm too poor to afford a real doctor and those pretentious ass agents are too uptight to give a girl a break!!


Please enjoy the ride and feel free to add your own stories of how 'the man' (those damn agents, vanities, PODs, and publishing companies) stuck it to you. Oh, and if I find anything that actually works in the anal little world of writing, I’ll post that too!!

Hey, it's all fair in love and war, right? So, it should be all fair in writing and publishing too!! Or have I just black-balled my invisible writing career?

-Just my two cents, which don’t appear to be worth a damn these days!!!